It’s true isn’t it? Whatever happens in life, the opposite is always somewhere around the corner: something sad is counterbalanced by something good.. just like starving eventually leads to eating. It has only happened 3 times in 10 days. but that is 3 more times than for several months. I hate it when this happens. It goes one of 2 ways: back to bulimia, or back to restriction (the latter is the more likely in my current circumstances)
Whatever, it doesn’t even matter. Nothing matters when my whole life feels, no, IS out of control. I can’t do anything. I only think about food. My studying is all up in the air, and it’s ,money related so I can’t even sort it out.
Nothing is in control. Food isn’t even in control. Everything feels pointless and I’m just willing that tomorrow I won’t eat anything I’m not allowed. I have nothing- not thin, not got a plan for the next academic year, not got anything that I can focus on that is in my control.