Although I’m not religious, I have always loved Christmas. Since a young age, it has been one of the few family days in the year. There’s a decade between my age and my brothers, so as a child I looked forward to having Christmas Day with them. I also love choosing gifts for people, and enjoy receiving things people have chosen for me. Getting the decorations up if my favourite bit of the preparations, too.
The worst bit however, is the anxiety about every detail. I detest that food is such a big part of the day for everybody else, while for me it’s a big source of worry instead. Trying to work out exactly what food will be safe and what time I can eat gets so overwhelming. I’ve finally made my decisions about this years meal. Outside of the roast dinner, I’m having my own, normal food, and I will be eating it in my room where nobody can comment. I don’t want to feel sad or stressed by it; I just want to get to the end of the day and know I’ve eaten an amount that my ed considers safe. In that respect, it needs to be just like any other day.
Tomorrow will be the last chance I have to go to the gym, and that makes me feel pressured for me to do enough… if anyone knows wtf would qualify as enough for my stupid brain, I’m all ears 😂
Anyway, I’m going to write down everything exactly as it is going to be food-wise for 25/26th so I can get it out of my mind and know it is planned and okay. Another essential tomorrow will be a Christmas film (already watched Elf, Nativity, Nativity 2, and a bit of Love Actually) I cant get enough! Outside of the festive and romantic comedy genres, I have almost no film knowledge. I like to think I make up for it in these 2 areas 😂
Hope everyone has a relaxing and positive weekend xxx