I am somebody who likes to feel prepared, always trying to get ahead of myself. The problem is, it can actually cause more harm than good if it becomes out of control.
How far ahead does one plan? And which things are important to prepare for?
Perfect example: yesterday I began to feel stressed about money, as I’ve had a shift taken off me for next week. I don’t know yet if I will get a different day in replacement when future rotas are done. I’m not working much, but doing some to have the money for my therapy, and so the spiral begins…
How much will I get? What if I only ever get 2 shifts not 3 a week? How can I pay for x,y,z? I should look for another job. But where? Blah blah blah.
I can’t plan finances based on unfixed circumstances, just like I couldn’t buy enough toothpaste to last me the rest of my life, or plan exactly how many bus trips I will take in the next year. It’s all just a guess, and the guesses won’t reflect reality so what’s the point in jumping to conclusions.
Ah, hello unhelpful thinking style #CBT 😂 but seriously, my energy needs to be put into planning things I can control, and use the remaining energy to handle the unexpected as they come. I’m not sure it’s possible to stop the thoughts coming to my mind, but the spiral of thoughts aren’t necessary.
I suppose we will see what happens next time something comes along that makes me want to get carried away in mind…
Yea I understand. There’s a thin line between preparedness and being responsible verses obsessing over things or outcomes. I find just staying in the present, doing my best, and setting small attainable milestones helps. Also reminding myself that the future is never certain and things can always change so be willing to bend when needed. Thanks for sharing 😊
“Small attainable milestones” says it perfectly! I’m working on a few things throughout February, which are small and achievable (I hope!) x
Yes indeed! I just don’t do goals I know just aren’t realistic. Doing so sets me up for failure! Good luck on your goals and modify as needed😊