Thank goodness for today being my day off! I feel like I’ve used my day to the max, and no matter if you like your job or not chill time is always necessary. (Read chill time as “taking a lot of naps”)
Catching up with several friends and my Auntie over the phone is always on my to do’s on a Saturday, and the relationships with those special people are hugely important to the way I feel. I’m lucky to have complete certainty in that there are people who are there for me if and when I need them. Equally, low moods can make me feel alone, but feelings aren’t always right, are they?
My Facebook memories have been filled with photos and statuses from my graduation last year (plus those of the year below me filling my news feed!) and it’s got me thinking about what graduate life has taught me.
Of course I left my training with knowledge and skills that have helped me, but nothing can replace actual experience- both good and bad. One of the biggest things has been becoming the boss of my own progress; setting goals, finding time and places to practice, taking on board criticism. I’ve also learned to never settle for where I am. Creative work is always changing and not always predictable, so this year has taught me to always be looking for potential opportunities, while also maximising the experience I’m currently having.
Performing the same shows every week has made me find ways to push myself and try to develop and see a difference between the beginning and end of the contract. Basically, being complacent is not an option.
One of the hardest lessons of graduate life? It’s not a race. There isn’t one destination for everybody, and people getting a better job quicker than me doesn’t make me a failure. For me that’s challenging. I’m black and white about everything…. shock horror 🙈
There are parts of training I’d love to do again, but other parts that I’m glad to have left behind (aka fitness at 8am and my least favourite classes/teachers 😂).
Ps. Mental health problems will come with you, even if you move countries, so note to self: money for therapy is worth it and get your shit together.
I’m also stuck in black and white thinking. Interestingly, with therapy I had managed to start thinking in the grey, so to speak. When my therapist recently said how I think in black and white it was a shock. I realized the truth of it but have no idea when that happened. Perhaps that is our default. It takes effort to get the mind sorted. You’re right, without therapy, I don’t know how I could have survived.
I think it feels so normal, that we don’t always see it as an issue!